Pepperdine is gorgeous.
End of story.
As in, 'game over' for me, as both jared and cecily say.
Ok, not necessarily, but i was chatting with a JD/MBA combo degree guy who has the scholarship i'm here for, and from what he told me, based on my GMAT score alone, it is quite possible i could even get an MBA. for free. i'm like...whaaaaa???
that was um, a surprise. we had dinner with the previous two years of Faculty Scholars tonight after flying in, and tomorrow is activities all day, then Monday is on campus/in classes/getting tours/meeting the dean/interviewing/listening to bonus lectures all day, then stuff Tues. morning and come back then.the interersting thing about tonight was that somehow i 'randomly' ended up taking my seat across from the one guy in the entire group who is doing exactly what i want to do [and both degrees free], and in the middle of a group of strong Christians, too.
and next to the only person i heard w. a southern twang. it was as if God was/is guiding my steps, which is the best aspect, and most rewarding thing of all.oh yeah...they have a really good law school, too, and have Supreme Court justices in to speak on a regularly basis...stuff like that.and the Pacific Coast Highway has some nice views :)
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Monday, February 23, 2009
the light unto my path
a funny thing happened tonight, as i began to tidy up and prepare for a move. I found my headlamp, and for whatever reason, began to use it, with most of the house lights off. It was perhaps just satiation of my desire for adventure--even as explicated in the mundane and routine. Or perhaps it was God gently prodding me....for it seemed like a lightning bolt to my brain when He reminded me that His word is indeed the lamp to my feet.
So i noticed some things:With a lamp, instead of a lighted house, everything is more dangerous. [the amount of Scripture one reads then, seems to be inversely proportional to one's succeptibility to danger, and yet proportionally correlated to the danger one will face]
The lamp reveals things in the darkness that are not evident in a house full of light. Like small spiders, and marks on the wall, and greasy-finger-stains-on-my-computer-because-i-eat-every-meal-on-the-couch-b/c-i'm-a-bachelor. I think this is why I cannot stay in the house full of light,aka Colorado Springs, as euphoric and pristinely blissful as it may be. That is to say...some are made to stay in a lighted house, like some are the creatures made for the mainframe Zion, in 'the Matrix.' Like it or not, it seems i'm made to strap my keister in a ship and rocket out to battle in a world hostile to my very existence. Well...not perhaps all the time.
But my point is, the world is hostile to those who stand for something worth dying for.But that is not to say one should read the Word less...only that one should take the Word, as it is indeed a lamp unto one's feet and a light unto one's path...into the trepidation and ominous blackness where scant light or truth is ever shone. If you don't regularly use your headlamp, you forget its nuisances. Ditto for the Holy Scriptures.I had been out of the O.Testament too long...i forgot how fierce, wild, and yes--Sovereign, God truly is.
Frankly, I'm re-thinking my entire existence. Not because i think God has changed [nor has He deceased, Nietzsche]. Instead, it is my view that has changed...."it is only your mind that bends...not the spoon." What a finite and puny mind i have....always thinking more of myself than i should.God's whispers that accompany the lamp He has given us sound earth-shaking in the silence and solitude of darkness. And if you are quiet enough, quite overwhelm the absence of light. it is as if His words are simply 'more real' than the nothingness...which reminds me:He made contrast. He set this entire thing up in contrast. This came through to me in reading through Jeremiah and Acts....it is a 'macro' theme of entire Word itself.
God made things in contrast--opposition even. He is opposed to things. He kills people at times. Well maybe you haven't forgotten, but methinks i had. Which could be why we appreciate things...the contrast. The lamp in darkness made me appreciate His words even more....and my headlamp made me appreciate the house of light moreso than i had in quite a while. And the same for the Christian mecca of Co. springs, which it appears i'll be leaving in 6 months...just like i'm leaving this current blessing of a home in a week or two. reminds me of Lewis's claim that we shouldn't be asking about pain, but...what sort of Being creates pleasure??!!?!? what a concept???
but nooooooo, here we are complaining about pain.and i realize how little pain i really have in my life.
well, anyway...if you're still reading this, glad i haven't lost your interest just yet. if you're asking yourself...is matthew really goofy and crazy enough to be wearing a headlamp around in a mostly-dark house while packing his things...the answer is yes. but you SHOULD be asking yourself...is matthew and anyone else who claims this crazy enough to actually think an Omnipotent uncaused-cause who created our entire cosmos cares enough to speak through innocuous events and silly things like headlamps and dark houses to people?
yes, yes i do. and i've found its in the most weird/random/unexpected moments that His gentle proddings and whispers tend to scream the loudest into my soul which has, thanks to Him, a renewed yearning to know Him intimately.
PSALM 119:105] "Thy word [is] a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path."
Friday, February 6, 2009
Spacious
I'm living in a 3200 square foot furnished home at the moment...house-sitting, basically. It's been a bit strange living here as its gone from being occupied by 5 guys [with a 6th guy's stuff in the garage] to 'just me,' though i must confess, it hasn't been what i expected.
I anticipated immense boredom, regret, and generally, to suffer through a tortuous mundane existence. That has not been the case at all. I was worried that all the transformation, restoration, and regeneration God has wrought in me since last May would somehow be undone. Silly me.
A trusted friend of mine has correctly diagnosed that this is the time for things to 'settle' and while i was anticipating this, i didn't view it as valid until he said that. What i mean is, i felt that perhaps i had missed something...God wanted me to do something else, leave Focus, whatever.
I just realized i've been writing 3 lines at a time. Probably because i haven't written in a while, my subconscious desire to weave words together, at times in poetic form, is busting at the seams. I've been putting words together since September--arrogant words about how great i am, and why every law school should accept me.
So far, everyone has. Well, 2 business schools have told me no, and 2 more have said to wait. But its kind of like asking your dream girl out and having her say no--its kind of what you're expecting. The rest of the law schools have all said 'yes.' And many of them are offering me $
$ is a good thing, but its not the only thing. If it were, i'd have never came here to Colorado, or never stayed here, that's for sure. You can't put a price on happiness, and you can't quantify quality of life.
It has been such an unexpected journey, and so much has changed over the past 6 months. The world has been opening up, layer by layer, and i feel so blessed, humbled, and grateful all at the same time, in overwhelming degree. I've only once before had a spiritual time like this, and it also came before a major move to an educational experience. Perhaps that's what God is up to. Or, perhaps He never wanted it interrupted, which is what happened.
Whatever the case, i've been enjoying it. And not only that, but the community has been mind-blowing, as has been working in an enriching, supportive environment. Add to that a great home [thanks Roc & Bev!], skiing, golf, basketball, and my new discipline--weightlifting--and its been quite a life.
I'm working back into reading and writing, but i think i may have needed the rest. It was quite an intense intellectual overhaul in 2008, and so some short rest in 2009 has been well-needed. There will be plenty of time to get revved up this August :)
I anticipated immense boredom, regret, and generally, to suffer through a tortuous mundane existence. That has not been the case at all. I was worried that all the transformation, restoration, and regeneration God has wrought in me since last May would somehow be undone. Silly me.
A trusted friend of mine has correctly diagnosed that this is the time for things to 'settle' and while i was anticipating this, i didn't view it as valid until he said that. What i mean is, i felt that perhaps i had missed something...God wanted me to do something else, leave Focus, whatever.
I just realized i've been writing 3 lines at a time. Probably because i haven't written in a while, my subconscious desire to weave words together, at times in poetic form, is busting at the seams. I've been putting words together since September--arrogant words about how great i am, and why every law school should accept me.
So far, everyone has. Well, 2 business schools have told me no, and 2 more have said to wait. But its kind of like asking your dream girl out and having her say no--its kind of what you're expecting. The rest of the law schools have all said 'yes.' And many of them are offering me $
$ is a good thing, but its not the only thing. If it were, i'd have never came here to Colorado, or never stayed here, that's for sure. You can't put a price on happiness, and you can't quantify quality of life.
It has been such an unexpected journey, and so much has changed over the past 6 months. The world has been opening up, layer by layer, and i feel so blessed, humbled, and grateful all at the same time, in overwhelming degree. I've only once before had a spiritual time like this, and it also came before a major move to an educational experience. Perhaps that's what God is up to. Or, perhaps He never wanted it interrupted, which is what happened.
Whatever the case, i've been enjoying it. And not only that, but the community has been mind-blowing, as has been working in an enriching, supportive environment. Add to that a great home [thanks Roc & Bev!], skiing, golf, basketball, and my new discipline--weightlifting--and its been quite a life.
I'm working back into reading and writing, but i think i may have needed the rest. It was quite an intense intellectual overhaul in 2008, and so some short rest in 2009 has been well-needed. There will be plenty of time to get revved up this August :)
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